We Can Wonder
– The World Begins With Wonder –
Wonder is the beginning. It is the space from which all things unfold. It gives birth to questions, it is the womb of understanding. It molds from the empty space of awareness all that can be known.
Deb – my love, my partner, my human – recently held up a mirror for me. The humdrum of everyday life had gotten to me, and allowed sloth and torpor to take over. It robbed the light from my eyes. And she, with her perspicacity, with her deep presence and understanding, left the subtle antidote:
“Your wonder for existence delights me.”
How could I forget!? We can wonder!
God, she is so in tune with the needs and the emotions of everyone around her. What a blessing to have her near me, to have such a wonderful friend, such a caring, understanding, and giving partner.
In any case, to fill my boundless cup of wonder, to reignite the spark in my eyes, I decided to wonder a bit.
I wonder at the first kid to gaze up at the heavens and wonder. The first kid to ponder them, to question them, to position herself in them.
I wonder at the first kid to turn his attention back, to look inward to his own soul, to stand in awe and marvel at it. The first kid to ask “Who am I?”
I wonder at my own existence, wonder at all the pieces of myself, wonder at all the people, at all the tragedies and triumphs, at all the tears and laughter, my being is built upon.
I wonder at my place in it all, at my place in the world, at my place in existence. I wonder where I end and the world begins.
I wonder what it would be like to forget myself, to forget my history, my memories, my prejudices and biases, my concepts and beliefs, to forget my knowings, and sink into the division-less space of existence. I wonder what it would be like to become a child again, to meet the raw, unadulterated data of experience.
I wonder what it would be like to rediscover myself in others, to see myself in nature, to know myself as the world. I wonder what it would be like to live and to breathe as the earth, to feel the rhythm of her oceans in my blood. I wonder what it would be like to be the light of the sun and the stars. I wonder what it would be like to know my Self in its full and undivided nature.
I wonder, would I stop trying to get somewhere, stop trying to become someone, and instead simply be? I wonder, then would I love myself, would I be convicted in the miracle of my own being? Would I understand myself, would I forgive myself, would I be compassionate toward myself?
I wonder, would I finally live from my own heart rather than live by someone else’s expectations? Would I put more caring attention into life, into my relationships, into my work and my art, into my character, into my virtues, into my being?
I wonder what it would be like, what it would feel like, to navigate my relationships without falling into self-concern, to have each encounter reflect the stillness and boundlessness of eternity.
I wonder what words I would speak, what steps I would take, what beauty and goodness I would witness if I lived undivided, if I lived each moment in the One Beating Heart.
I wonder, would I give up my addictions – give up weed, esteem, control, and thoughts of self-concern. I wonder, would I live not for money or fame, for gold or glory, but for Love.
I wonder what it would be like to know peace – a complete and unshakeable peace, a peace that is carried in every step, a peace that is felt in every breath.
I wonder what my family and friends need most from me right now. Do they need my loving attention, my heart’s boundless embrace? Do they need my ears? My silent deeds? My support, affection, or encouragement? Do they need me to reflect their divine beauty and goodness? Or, do they need a strong back and a soft heart? I wonder, how I can love the people around me more without asking for anything in return?
I wonder what the world is missing? What does it need to heal, to awaken, to love freely? What are people searching for and why? Where are they searching? Where aren’t they looking? What questions aren’t they asking? What am I searching for, where am I not looking, what am I not asking?
I wonder what the world would be like if its people were free – free from mindless attention, from automatic reactivity, free from blind authority. I wonder what the world would be like if its people were free to vote for their leaders, free to pursue their own beliefs, free to practice their own peaceful rituals? I wonder what the world would be like if its people were free to express themselves?
I wonder what the world would be like if each of us could see past the contents of awareness, past the fleeting, changing, and inconsistent world of appearances, and instead could gaze into the everlasting light of awareness. I wonder what the world would be like if it knew itself, if it knew Love directly, if humanity found itself in Love and Love in it.
I wonder what I can do to move the world in that direction.
I wonder at my reflection, and give thanks for another day of wondering.